★★☆☆☆
Dir. Scott Charles Stewart. 2011. PG-13. 87mins. Paul Bettany, Cam Gigandet, Maggie Q.
The world is being overrun by vampires that look like giant living boogers with teeth. And only one man, the titular ass-kicking cleric (Bettany), can pick the snot. Director Scott Charles Stewart — reuniting with his growly lead performer after their John Carpenter–lite apocalypse thriller, Legion — gives this martial-arts-East–meets–wild-wild-West mishmash a sick-slick polish. (The dominant palette is blue-green on black for night, bleached-out monochrome for day.) And the film’s save-the-niece-from-the-evil-others narrative is a blatantly direct steal from John Ford’s The Searchers — without, of course, any of that classic’s insights or complexity. But as solemnly noted during the sequel-ready climax, “This is just the beginning!” The God of Aborted Franchises will be pleased.—Keith Uhlich